I'm still recovering from Saturday night, wherein I think I impressed the varied patrons at the Flora-Bama bar mightily with my interpretive dance rendition of Melissa Ethridge's "Come To My Window." I'd like to think that not many possess the kind of skill it takes to prostrate oneself upon a dirty picnic table in front of 500 sweat-soaked rednecks, arms arched and extended, to symbolize "the light of the moon." Tell me that's not talent and I'll tell my new girlfriend, Suzette, to pin your scrawny neck to the wall with one of her huge biceps.
Pics of the painting will have to wait til tomorrow because I flew back at 5:30 this morning and haven't been home yet. R says the color looks great in the front bedroom that I would've finished completely on Friday if it hadn't been so ridiculously hot and I hadn't spent half the time sponging myself down and trying to decide which clothes I could strip off without being embarassed to answer the door if one of our neighbors stopped by to ask if we'd heard about that time Don and Meredith got stomachaches and ended up barfing up a rainbow of joy and love. "They were just so full of it that it was the only way out!"
Oh yeah, well did Don and Meredith ever give out Christmas baskets of homemade beef jerky? I didn't think so.
Anyway, if you ever end up painting your own place, whatever you do, wait at least a day and a half to judge the color. Seriously, get out of the room, close the door and come back tomorrow. Otherwise you'll end up walking back and forth, bringing different lights in and out, and working yourself up to hyperventilation mode because you can't believe you just wasted 8 GD hours to have a bedroom look like Slimer just made sweet sweet love to the walls. If you wait that little bit of extra time, then when you look again, it ends up resembling a little slice of chartreuse heaven more than a sticky ecto aftermath.
Just try to ignore all the places where you later notice that it dripped all over the molding. Because it did. And you will notice.
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4 comments:
I wanted to go to the annual Mullet Toss this year
http://www.florabama.com/Special%20Events/Mullet%20Toss/mullet_toss_faq.htm
...but I didn't make it to Florabama until May. Shucks.
i heart the florabama...did you steal plastic pitchers like the na and i did in college during spring break?
Will you paint for jerky? I've got my MIL recruited for trim, but am still auditioning for the role of wall-slimer extraordinaire
They don't even have pitchers anymore!!! I thought about throwing my bra up in the rafters, but let's be honest, bras are not cheap.
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